Yesterday a man seven years my senior commented on my age and my upcoming birthday and said "Wow, your biological clock must be ticking."
Did I punch him in the throat?
No.
Did I ask him how Viagra is working for him?
Should have.
Did I agree with him and flash a smile?
Oh hell no.
I simply said, "You know, that's kind of a mean comment" and went on my merry way.
Today, I went to the liquor store. I handed over my check card to pay and then she said something wonderful:
"MAY I SEE YOUR ID?"
"Sure can!" I exclaimed.
"Oh, it's just that your signature is worn off...." she said.
"Really? You had to go there? You couldn't let me enjoy it for a minute?" I asked.
She tried to make it better.
"It's just that you're a regular."
I laughed. Apparently not only do I look much older than drinking age, but my love of Blue Moon, Corona and Mike's Hard Lemonade is no secret.
I will be celebrating my birthday with Bret Michaels because he "rocks my world" and I used to love driving around in my 1980 Oldsmobile Starfire listening to my Poison cassette tapes. I only wish I still had my long hair so I truly could rock the 80s.
I imagine I'll be back to drinking Blue Moon and loving goat cheese and pine nuts again by Tuesday—but for this weekend, I'll drink light beer and swear a little bit. Ok, perhaps more than a little bit.
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This is great! Enjoy your birthday!!!
ReplyDeleteIt's all relative hon. You're still a pup to me. I pegged you at about Sam's age. (?) I like to say I'm still young and hot to, er... Mick Jagger. Heh.
ReplyDeleteHappy Birthday *kid*. :)
Ha! I met Sam when she was in 7th grade and I was the adviser for an after school program!!
ReplyDeleteHappy, Happy Birthday! Hope your boy puts on a good show.
ReplyDeletewhen i cuss at random, i call it my tourettes. it happens more often than you would think. soulkid caught me the other day- she was in my bedroom, i didn't know it-- i was comin out of my bathroom, my neck and back were hurting-- of course you know i am fed up with that stuff -- so i had a random cussing attack. including the f bomb.. a few of them. as i walked out , she looked at me like i had lost my mind. i was embarrassed of course-- stammered a bit - and said -- oh, sorry, my tourettes. she said 'whatever'.
ReplyDeletehow does one explain that to a teenager?
heeeeere's johnnny :))
what is it with you and the long blonde haired men? i like bret and the kid too. can't wait for kid rocks album :)) i got brets and i likeee.
latah
Obviously I've been on Facebook too long...I just spent quite a while looking for the "like" button on your post. Anyway - like.
ReplyDelete